Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Raising Daughters

Today I was visiting looking at some of the different blogs that I like to read.  The post on one such blog was a letter written by the friend of a mom who needed advice.  This "mom's friend" had a daughter who was about to enter what might just be the "most hormonal-change time of her life."  She described some more things going on, such as "emotional drama unlike anything you would ever see in Hollywood."

I could definitely relate.  I posted a comment and thought I would share it here.
Me with one of our little girls

If I didn't know better, I would have thought that I was writing this letter! I have four daughters. One has already hit the teen years and the second one is right behind her as a tween. I think things with my teen are leveling off, except for dealing with peer pressure and bulleying. My tween is the one I am having hormonal drama with lately. Some days I fail fail terribly as a mother. My voice is raised a bit higher than I planned.  My patience is lacking.  I just can't take any more of the extremes...whether good or bad.

I can tell you that the time I pray for my girls has definitely increased. I don't remember my tween/teen years being so emotional and dramatic. Someone had posted earlier in the comments about speaking your child's love language. I think that ministering to your daughter in her love language is very important. My tween will tell me every now and then that she thinks I don't love her, even if I have just said it to her...because that is not her love language.

In the past, my husband and I have made a point to "date our daughters". This means that both he and I spend quality time with each of our daughters alone. It might be for a walk or to take a bike ride, maybe horseback riding at a friend's farm or just going out for a cup of tea and dessert. We have had a great deal of change in our lives in the last 9 months and very recently, the girls have been asking about when do they get to have a date with daddy or mommy.

Another thing that I think is important is to recieve encouragment from other moms who have been there before you. Find a Christian woman you trust who has raised a tween/teen and let her encourage and mentor you. She can be your sounding board, prayer partner or just a friend whose shoulder you can cry on.

I am glad that in the midst of my failures as a parent, God IS Faithful!

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