Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Completing Him Challenge....Be the woman your man needs

I recently read about this challenge on another blog and decided to post.   It's week #7 in the Summer Completing Him Challenge!  and this week's challenge is: Support his vision. Discuss his vision for your family. Where does he see your family in 1 year, 5 years, and 10 years. Share with us how you let your husband lead.
While I have recently chatted with my husband about his vision for our family, we haven't really purposed to put anything in writing.  But I can clearly remember a time in my 16 years of marriage that I struggled with my husband’s vision for our family. It's great when you are in charge and people have to follow you but it's not always fun being a follower when you don't understand, like or know where the leader is going.  Here's my story....

We had been on staff at my dad’s church for about 5 years, when he felt the call to be an Army chaplain. The road to get there would require 3 more years of education and being a full time senior pastor, so to me the career change was something I’d have time to adjust to little by little. After his first semester in Seminary, he told me that he needed to withdraw from the school due to teaching that was unbiblical. I was devastated as my husband had a full scholarship to attend there but I understood his decision and supported him whole heartedly. It was the next decision that threw me. In the process of looking at other schools, my husband wanted to pack up our family and move 300 miles away to finish his education. I did not want to go! I cried, I fought, I prayed, I received counsel…I cried some more. It took me a few months to submit my will to my husband’s leading. We notified the church board, put our house on the market and began to plan our move away from family and friends. Two months later, our house had still not sold but we received some news…my father, who was the Sr. Pastor of the church resigned. As my husband was seeking the Lord, he felt that we were suppose to stay at the church and not move. I couldn’t believe it…it had taken me months to finally come to terms with moving and now we were not moving.

My husband became the Sr. Pastor of the church and continued to work on his degree. He completed his degree two years later but wasn’t sure whether chaplaincy was still in his future. By this point we had been at the church for over 10 years. We were happy where we were and I thought we’d be there forever. I was working part –time from our home and we were saving money to purchase a house. The new year came and my husband came to me and told me he had to resign and pursue Army Chaplaincy. I was not prepared for his next statement. The bylaws required 30 days notice, so he was going to give his 30 days…next week. This couldn’t be happening. We would be homeless with the only income from my part-time job.

I had learned from the past to follow my husband leading and to submit to his vision and leadership for our family. We had a lot of change that next year but I can happily say that we are where God wants us to be. Now three years later, after a yearlong deployment to Iraq, we are now living in Korea for two years, ministering the soldiers and their families.

You may not enjoy where your husband feels his career or vision for your family is going but let me encourage you to trust God in the midst of what you might think of as a storm.

Side note:
My husband initally started this blog in 2007 to share his journey to military chaplaincy.  Here is his first post, just a week after his last day at the church.

1 comment:

Cami said...

Thanks for sharing that great story. I have never heard of that "Completing Him" challenge. It sounds fascinating. I would like more information on it.